How I Became the Wild Woman Visionary
Art, Spirituality and Holistic Wellness have become a way of life.
But it hasn’t always been that way.
For years I ignored my creative power.
I hid behind my husband’s shadow afraid to be seen by the world, slipping potent sketches away for fear of what people would think.
I ran around in circles on launching my business and starting my life, searching endlessly to find the “magic solution” to my problems.
But it wasn’t working.
Instead of my twenties being a time of joy, excitement and vitality – it became an uphill battle with chronic pain and fatigue, as well as intense depression and anxiety.
Sidestepping what made my soul sing and pushing away the very parts of me that made me unique only made me ill.
By 25 years old I was nearly bedridden, suffering from severe migraines four to five times a week. I was barely surviving day to day, some days unable to move or eat because the pain was so excruciating.
Existing this way was making me fade away little by little, and knew that if I didn’t change the way I lived my life I wasn’t going to make it to my third decade. I was literally wasting away and was terrified at the thought of it.
So I had an honest conversation with the divine. Sitting beneath the stars, unsure of my future with tears in my eyes, I started to pray.
I gave the creative power of the universe an ultimatum: take me home so I would no longer have to endure the pain or show me the way to something better.
Me being here to tell you this story is proof that miracles occur, because not long after that night I embarked on a two-year pilgrimage that led me on a journey of divine surrender and courageous self-love.
After igniting onto this deeply spiritual path I searched within myself and through sisterhood to find what had been missing – the very essence that breathed life into me, that made me quiver with excitement and jump out of bed every morning with inspired motivation.
This was the beginning of my cultivation of the Wild Woman Visionary.
Discovering my wild woman visionary archetype was not a singular event - but rather a series of moments that opened me up to the portal of my own inner universe.
Communing with mother earth as I danced beneath the moon.
Singing the songs of my soul while drumming the beat of my heart.
Partaking in sacred medicine and infusing my art with potent magic.
Reading books that nourished my spirit and learning how to infuse ritual into my life.
Playing with oracle cards and working with goddess archetypes.
Connecting with soulful women around the world through circle and sisterhood while embracing my sacred femininity.
It was in these spaces where I met HER – the wild essence within me that is fully connected to the earth, tapped into the divine and empowered in her sensuality.
The sweet puma medicine that stirs within my root and sacral chakras.
The wise medicine woman who has complete trust of her own intuition and the forces of creation.
The luscious goddess who resides within her own temple as she prays for insight and healing.
By embracing these faceted archetypes within me I grew and evolved exponentially – fast becoming the woman I desired to be.
A woman I looked up to, honored and respected.
But life has a funny way of testing us when we feel we’ve reached a plateau – and can seemingly throw our way experiences that we never would have fathomed being able to survive.
The year 2016 was my deep and painful initiation through the fire – burning my proverbial flesh down to the bones.
In May that year I lost someone very dear to me. I received the news that my oldest brother had suddenly and tragically passed away, shattering the hearts of my family as well as his own. It was the worst pain I had ever experienced in my entire life – a pain I wouldn’t wish on my greatest enemy it was so immense.
While in August that same year I landed in the hospital with severe deep vein thrombosis, and had my top rib removed as result. I spent nearly a week in the ICU unable to get out of bed, while several months afterwards enduring what felt like endless blood tests and doctor’s appointments.
Not long after these two events I fell into a deep depression where I spiraled into a pit of despair – afraid I would not survive my own turmoil and the grief that accompanied these losses.
It felt as if my heart had shattered into a million pieces and when I tried to put them back together they didn’t fit the same way. While other pieces were forever missing and would never come back.
But despite the intense pain I endured a small still voice urged me to keep going, to keep dreaming and to never give up.
I realized that I could no longer ignore my soul’s whispering and heart’s desires any longer.
For too long I had hidden the best parts of myself away for fear of others trampling over them with their judgmental words and toxic remarks.
For too long I pushed away my passions because I did not believe in myself.
All of these moments led me here – from the good to bad and all in between. I have faced my inner demons, been bullied by the voice of self-doubt, and festered within my own shame. I had many hiccups along the way and some days I still do.
But the human spirit is resilient. It has the amazing ability to rise from the ashes of its former self and grow strong like a tree towards the sky – reaching higher than before.
For when I am fully tapped into the power of my inner wild woman visionary – I witness miracles as they unfold before me. I experience deep profound shifts and heal wounds that were screaming out for release.
SHE has helped me release my power, embrace my gifts and share my story.
She is the essence of my business - the thread that weaves my art together and the one who speaks to my heart when I am out of alignment with my truth.
Because once I discovered that divine creativity was at the heart of my life and business, I blossomed.
And I discovered myself over and over as I laid my colored pencils to paper – the swishing of their strokes becoming music for my ears and medicine for my soul.
Because life is not about striving for unachievable perfection, but rather to embrace our authentic truth and see that all our imperfections – our scars, quirks and rough edges – are what makes us beautiful, lovable and perfect as we are.
It is about embodying who we came here to be and living life to the fullest, breaking through our own glass ceilings, shattering through the lies we’ve told ourselves for years, and expressing gratitude even when life feels uncertain.
Because we are meant for more than the ordinary.
We are meant to become our own version of extraordinary and be a bad-ass doing it.
So take off that mask and shed those cloaks that keep you hidden. Because I desire to see the wildness unfold from within you. For I know SHE lives in every single one of us – and all we have to do is sit in the stillness long enough to listen.
Are you ready?
The Wild Woman Visionary
She who dances between the veils
Bridging worlds and embodying the divine
She is the channel of her own inner light
The Creatrix of her own reality
Shaping the world with her visions
Healing the wounds that live deep in the psyche of our world
The shamanic priestess who walks the path between her shadows
Initiated by her own pain
Transforming through the fire of her desires
Diving deep into the waters of her own power
She sees through the eyes of her hands
Filling her world with colorful vibrations
She who has lived a thousand lives in one lifetime
Who soars through her dreams
On the wings of a moth
Brewing beneath the soil of the earth
As she sprouts and grows
Roots searching deep for the nutrients of inspiration
She is wild and cannot be tamed
For she has too much work to do
“Wild Visionary Alive” by Kristin Lewis ©2017